Sweet sunrise; upset surprise

spoken word piece by wj...
Why the insecurity?
Why the confusion,
the doubt,
the mystery?
We awake, the sun rises.
Head-strong: confront the day; 
plan is? no surprises
then it hits – Crisis.
Thoughts start spiralin’
“must’ve been…”

And the back and forth limbo: “was it me? …Or was it he?”
And without a word that is even spoken, the devil takes hold and starts runnin…
Those thoughts :(

“No! Stop!”
 
For a split second you actually know its not true, but the battle begins and he’s on to you. 

“But he meant it by his actions” …our own mind deceives us and we somehow allow the enemy to convince our insecurities are what make us.

Rejection.
Annoyance.
Not pretty enough. 
Not thin enough…
Dumb.
Not worthy of time or space. 
“Do they even look at your face? …when you speak” the voice speaks.  

And you suddenly feel like you’re 3ft tall, 
spinning & twirling in that bright yellow dress; 
“Daddy! look at me... Am I your princess?” 

When in reality he’s too caught up in his own mess 
to lift a brow, take a look, smile & say:
“Yes, my child. I see… 
My oh my, whatta beauty”
With thoughts not being quite understood, 
you wonder how you just got from where you sit today to thinking of yesterday 
and dreaming about another day… 
fairytales? 

You shake it off. 
“silly thoughts” you think. 

....But wait. Isn’t that just what he wanted? 
You think it’s a fantasy, 
when in real life, you can’t see: 
You’re being deceived by the one with a great ability to lie. 
He’s called a snake for a reason, my dear.  
Today like last time, you’ve somehow convinced yourself you’re not enough. 
When history repeats itself, 
and before you can seek the help, 
you reject those impurities that are really just lies clothed in-insecurities.
What started with a funk, 
or some mind junk you let getaway, 
the enemy took it and decided it was too fun not to play...
The non-verbal ques added to the scenario, 
but he doesn’t ask permission before he goes, a
nd without taking “every thought captive” our sweet sunrise, and upset-surprise catches us.  

And 
we 
stumble
“Be on guard” Corinthians tells us. 
“Stand firm in the faith; be courageous; be strong” 
Resist the evil one and he will flea.  
Perhaps tomorrow’s sun-rise will be a Sweet-surprise; 
and You can rejoice in finding your refuge, in the TRUTH of HIS Eyes!